When was the last time you truly left your phone alone for a whole hour? No peeking at Slack, or email? Does anyone do that anymore?
After four months together, a client of mine—a real go-getter—shared something that really landed:
“My husband told me I’ve never had a healthier relationship with work.”
Her son had been sick. Her former M.O. would have been to feel guilty and check Slack nonstop. This time she kept her cool, stayed focused and protected her boundaries. Total win.
You don’t have to quit and throw your phone in a fountain, like in The Devil Wears Prada. But shifting your mindset, that sense of freedom, is real and within reach.
Ready to ditch being ‘always on’? Keep listening for three steps to stop hovering and start real delegation.
Why Always Being ‘On’ Holds Your Team Back
You know the drill: endless pings, pressure to be ‘always on,’ hovering over every project and message. That tight grip? It slows everything down. Projects stall, teams freeze—who steps up if there’s no room to try?
I know you keep it moving—amazing. But always doing it all blocks your team from taking real ownership themselves. It’s not a great long-term strategy.
Back to my client’s story—she committed to changing how she works. She spotted her old habits that were holding her back, chose “balance and empowerment” as her guide, and even deleted Slack and email from her phone when she was off the clock. To her surprise and delight, her team stepped into the gap, and it became a win for everyone.
For you, it may well take:
- Setting clear limits for your time, energy, and effort
- Letting go of what you can’t control, not just of tasks but the outcomes
- Spelling out expectations clearly and early, including how and when they should push information to you, and
- Encouraging your team to try new things, learn, and stumble, when the risks are low.
Three Steps to Build Team Independence
If letting go feels risky, try these three steps:
- Pick one area to release: Do a quick scan of your weekly schedule and pick one thing you can step back from this week. Maybe it’s monitoring a routine report, reviewing a draft, or troubleshooting something. Block time on your calendar for something else and tell your team: “You’ve got this. I’m stepping back this time.” It’s like handing your team the remote and letting them pick what’s next for once.
- Set them up to succeed: Have a quick huddle or drop a short note clarifying what good enough looks like and when (or if) to check in, and how to do it. Then resist the urge to hover.
- Debrief and have them share learning: Once it’s done, do a quick debrief. Ask what worked, what didn’t, and what they’d try next time. Keep it short and direct and try to just listen.
If this all feels awkward at first—good! That probably means you’re doing it right. All those “what if” worries—What if someone drops the ball? What if it takes longer?—that’s totally normal. That ambiguous space where learning can happen.
A First Step for Sustainable Leadership
Here’s the challenge for this week: What’s one thing—big or small—that you could hand off or step back from this month that would stretch your team’s ownership and confidence?
This month. Not next quarter. Not someday.
Hand off one responsibility and watch your team figure it out: How they problem-solve, how they step up, and how they handle decisions without waiting for your signal. Set the limits, then let your team find their way. Even if it’s weird at first, it’s probably worth it.
Let me know how it goes. And if your phone ends up in a fountain, well, at least you’ll have a good story!
And if you’re staying plugged in too much because it’s hard to keep your team accountable, check out episode 66. You’ll get a step-by-step way to start empowering your team with clear & effective feedback. Listen in at: yourfuturerealized.com/66.
You can’t stop the chaos, but you can change the game.